kindness, people, teams, angels
OK. Here in late October 2025, anyone else suddenly “into” garden-flags? Particularly this one. (pic 1)
Cómo décadas de “aventuras aburridas” me hacen pensar ahora constantemente en la #amabilidad y la #gratitud.
How decades of “boring adventures” have me now thinking constantly about #kindness and #gratitude.
First, before I get into my blooming garden-flag thing, I have always said … if there were an Olympics for making boring things exciting – or for just being boringly average in most things you do – I’d want to try out for the team.
Here’s my rationale.
I always felt lucky to have a home, and to have a wall. Starting at age 12, I “knew-how-to” kick a ⚽️ ball against the brick wall on the side of my house for 5+ hours at a time – just me and the ball and the wall. (pic 2) Year-round I thrilled the huge crowds in my mind.
Lucky enough to go to college, and after learning how to type, I started dreaming of computer algorithms in my sleep. When I woke up, I could program 12 hours at a clip – joyfully without uttering a word to anyone. This led to 3 decades of corporate IT “stuff”. My dreams drifted from ⚽️ to saving the world … by getting the right GE light bulb 💡 to the right store at the right time.
Smiling back on this, I sorta see averages even in my ambition.
Early on, the only reason I got good grades was to please my parents. They gave us $1 for each A on our report card!
When a new Chi-Chi’s restaurant opened in college, and still being a bit introverted, I applied to be a busboy. I’ll never forget when Kristy, the manager, told me that she thought I was “smart enough to be a food server”. “You sure?” as I shook my head.
Fifteen years later, I was asked to be a Chief Information Officer (CIO) at the peak of the crazed dot.com days. (pic 3) It necessitated a 2nd move to Cleveland (!) – definitely not an average thing. I just assumed the world’s IT talent pipeline had truly dried up. “Seriously, me?”
In that role, I got to be around people apparently way smarter than a food server. I always felt so unlikely to be around them and truly an outlier. When we were considering the benefit of annually ponying up billions for Microsoft software, I lamented: “Does anyone seriously need a better version of PowerPoint?” Maybe the seeds of my late garden-flag love were planted back then?
Meanwhile, all along the way, I always was easily distracted and mesmerized whenever I came upon a sports field. I’d invariably have to go walk on it and maybe even play on it.
And for the better part of 2 decades, I was your average soccer dad who coached a gaggle of kids— mostly my daughters and their friends. I think we lost way more than we won. I think this because I vividly remember winless seasons. I don’t recall the matching undefeated seasons. We did, however, win our share of sportsmanship awards. I even once won this. (pic 4) “Seriously? Had to be a down year for coaching?” (Thanks, Sher-bear.)
The daughters came into the picture because, in college again, a freckle-faced soccer groupie said “Hola!” to me— thinking I looked Mexican and spoke Spanish. She was half right. (pic 5)
She is my first ♥️, and we raised a family over these past 4 decades. (OK, my wife and daughters do not share in my average-ness … they are truly amazing.)
One day at home, a nurse called with the results of my 40-year-old fitness test. “You’re average,” she matter-of-factly proclaimed. I thought to myself, “Just don’t tell that to the kid kicking the ball on the side of the house.”
Finally, as I’ve leaned toward retirement in this last decade, I upped my game on boringly average things. I was recruited as a volunteer director for a credit union and volunteered to be on our small town’s planning board. Let’s go!
Well, that’s it. A quick 6 decades without a single garden-flag, and now into the seventh. (🙏🏽 if you’ve made it this far.)
This is my bid to be part of the team in the next Being-Average Olympics (hosted prolly in a place like nearby Albany).
And with that ramble now behind us, if there was also a Being-Incredibly-Lucky-in-Life Olympics … I would definitely find my way onto the podium 🥇🥈🥉. I don’t even have to try out.
Nowadays, at home, I tend to a small slice of forest that is home in the middle of nowhere. I also tend to a small field each day in the middle of nowhere. (pic 6) It was our small way of giving back. Creating a space where kids (of all ages) can challenge themselves, can dream, can have a “thing”, and can grow their self-confidence. That’s what fields did for me.
I’ll also admit to having a lot more non-average days in this 7th decade. They are usually the ones spent walking/sitting around with my grandkids (and grand-dogs). Time really stops. I dream of rebooting myself and being able to see the world through their eyes. These days are beyond amazing.
Finally returning to my original boring question about garden-flags. Maybe there is a connection with these grandchildren?
Having never bought one in 61 and a half years, I’ve now bought a dozen in less than a year.
It started with this NYJets one (pic 7) as I decided to throw the weight of my not-average ultra-fandom onto the J-E-T-S “bandwagon” this season. (Now at 0-7 as I write, this may be another winless season for me.) But look how beautiful it blends with nature. I think that is essential to a good garden-flag.
Then came the celebration of my 87yo mother-in-law’s half-century of die-hard love for the Cleveland Cavs. And more recently for her UConn 🏀 girls and 49ers 🏈 (she not secretly fell in ♥️ with Joe Montaña). From the day we met, she accepted this almost-Mexican with open arms. Despite our completely different upbringings, we enjoyed the common ground of sports love. Here we just transformed her TV-watching space. (pic 8) Even framed, all the garden-flags just bring positivity and simplicity.
And then came Buckeye 🏈, Michigan 💩, & Akron 💛 in my front porch – my morning thinking & dreaming space. (pic 9) These root me to the ground. OK I acknowledge some grievance with Michigan 🏈 since they have beaten the Bucks 4 straight as I write this.
Through all of this, I’ll also admit that I’ve walked the streets now twice this year with my sign. (pic 10) I’m pretty much a centrist but have become depressed with the shutdown of our country for our people, and now the demolition of the White House for our people. Ugh, it just feels to me that disrespect & grievance are in, while grace & gratitude are out. “Make a sign to express yourself,” I thought. But keep it as simple as a garden-flag since folks need to be able to read it as they drive by. “No Reyes. Only ☀️ Rays. Viva La Gente.” (Of course, I had to throw some contra Español in there. And my beautiful wife, who said “Hola!” to her Mexican, wanted the name of a friendly lawyer on my arm 🙃.)
Which brings me to the garden flag I started with. I’m obsessed with it. (pic 1) It’s link to nature. Rooted in humanity. It’s positivity. It’s simplicity.
Kindness. And the revolutionary need for more of it in our world.
It links so many threads of my boring life and urges me to find ways to give back more.
This garden-flag challenges me personally too. Con aprendiendo español. Con mis nietos. Con mi familia pasado y actualmente. Con celebrando mi primer día de los muertos.
So there you go. Garden-flags. Life changing. ☮️♥️🙏🏽
-pedro “rojo”
PS. I can’t wait for our grandkids to run on our field in the middle of nowhere.
Technology is linear. People … they are exponential. Again!
I think I first thought this 30 years ago in 1995.
I couldn’t stop thinking about it again this past month of 2025.
Thirty years ago, I was asked to lead a new 10-person IT team to improve how we made light bulbs 💡. (Important stuff!)
For the 10 years before that, my school/work life was Assembly language, operating systems, data structures, FORTRAN, Pascal, recursion, C++, VAX/VMS, ethernet, voice recognition, Lucalox Arc Tubes, VRSS, TOPS, … haha what a list. Concepts, ideas, “systems”. Ideally these all helped people. And I did work alongside so many wonderful, diverse, determined people.
But to be clear – nobody thankfully worked FOR me.
So when Tom walked in and asked me to “lead” a team, I was perplexed and worried. First, the end of my programming (legendary in my mind). And second, people now looking to me for direction??
I genuinely worried for Cindy, Charlotte, Beth, Laurie, Diana, Dan, Dave, Steve, & Evan. With near-zero coaching, my first year was trying to learn about each person individually (beyond making $, why did they choose to work here?) … and also about figuring out why this new team existed.
My first team meeting (Nela Park, Building 338, Room 200, 1PM) could have been a deleted scene from The Office. After much deep thought, I think the agenda I nervously passed out had a single item: “Why does this team exist? (Open Discussion)”. That had to give them all a boost of confidence 🙂
Thankfully, everyone survived that 1st year. Dave stopped in my office as I was in the throes of doing “performance reviews”. I must have looked troubled. “Are you okay doing this management stuff, Pete?”
I looked up. “You know. I do miss solving technical problems, programming. But I’m okay. Technology is kinda linear. People … they are exponential. If you could get it right with people – not an easy thing – you have no limits.”
(I’m sure I read that somewhere and didn’t make it up myself.)
I did really come to believe it.
And what I realize looking back is that all my instincts – on teams, building them, leading them – were born on a soccer field. It had always dominated the other part of my life.
So of course, I ended up building a field?
This past month (November 2025) was the culmination of a reimagining that started during the pandemic. We are just a beautiful field with fresh air and bright light – that can play long into the night, and can play long into the winter. Everything else is secondary to that.
We invested in the best field technology to become safer, cleaner, more high-performing, more like natural grass. The field is now nothing short of amazing.
And as I watched it all unfold, I realized that while the technology is very good (“kinda linear”), it is people again who made all the difference.
Mis nuevos amigos Eddie y su equipo. Fueron exponenciales.
They were exponential … in the beauty and the power of people working (and playing) together to accomplish hard and important things.
“I see you hang many flags from different country?”
Our flags celebrate teamwork and diversity. How people—who are all unique and different—come together to accomplish hard and important things. Their goal is common and visible. Their behavior is selfless, with the best players making everyone around them better.
Our back wall celebrates the seven counties who have lifted the women’s World Cup, and the eight countries who have lifted the men’s 🏆. As the world’s most popular game—in part for its simple rules and that anyone can play (just need a ⚽️)—it echoes the diversity of our real world with different styles, skills, roles to put that ball in the back of the net as you defend your own.
At midfield are the flags of the team that installed our new field … the components of the field by Dutch company Tencate, installed by a crew of six immigrating here from the Dominican Republic and from Honduras. This was a major ($170,000) game-changing investment for us. And while the new field technology is amazing, it is this crew that came together to make it a reality. Our field’s unique celebration of teamwork and diversity.
And as “kids” (of all ages!) play together here and challenge themselves—long into the winter (and spring-summer-fall) and long into each night—our flags smile down on the field.
The smiles are for all the golazos … for all the lessons learned doing hard things together … for all the laughs and joys of both failure and achievement … and for how it all will follow us off the field into real life.
“You left us way to soon”
Our field has angels. I don’t know how else to explain it. Their spirits embody our field and watch over it every day.
Between 2015 and 2019 in places far and near, we tragically lost four young people in the prime of their lives. They each were chasing their dreams, pursuing what they loved. Those four days represent the worst days we have ever had to endure. The grief and loss to their parents is unimaginable. Unbearable.
One I had coached over many years … one we had played against over many years … one played here all the time with his brother and even his dad at times … and one played here with his sister, brother, and dad (who also is one of my dearest friends).
The way in which they each left us was so randomly tragic that it could be any girl I ever coached or played against … any person that has ever played here … any person that loves the game … any of our own family and friends.
These four souls are anyone and everyone this field is for.
For me, they are still with us here. They aren’t done. They root for us. They cheer us to get up when we fall. They encourage us to help the person next to us, to truly live in the moment, and to not let a day be wasted.
Our angels softly whisper that “each new day is a blessing … a chance to be better … a chance to make things better.”
They also whisper to remind us of how precious and fragile life is.
They grace our field.
